Who REALLY is Taking Christ Out of Christmas?

My dad is a great guy, but as far as politics are concerned the apple has fallen miles to the left of the tree. He’s heavily involved in local Republican politics, loves GWBush and supports the compulsory kkkonservative causes no matter how askew they may be. There reigns the prototypical defense of God, family and country, except of course when such things get in the way.

This was typified by our conversation last night. We were watching Monday Night Football when a Coors Beer commercial wished all Coors drinkers a joyous “Happy Holidays”. He said, “See, there they are, taking Christmas out of their ads, why can’t they say ‘Merry Christmas’, it’s the attack on Christians again!”

I then explained to him that Coors is run by the 4th Reich, that they have immense Republican political clout and that they are dupes of the Bush Administration. They also have a horrible labor record and in the 1980’s would not retain homosexuals to work in their company. Like I said, good Republicans.

My dad said, “Our local group is going to deluge those bastards at the ACLU with Christmas cards—that’ll show them”.

This is where I got to make my lonely point. The Limbaughs, Hannitys and my dad are the culprits—THEY are taking Christ out of Christmas. THEY are the ones that neutered the concept. They are the ones that see Ol’ Beelzebub, some hippy Jew lawyer and/or wreath-burning homos around every corner during their Capitalist Month of Consumption. I explained it to him like this…

Instead of wasting their time, energy and money sending Christmas cards to the ACLU, well, What Would Jesus Do? Certainly the time they spend bitching and screaming as victims could be better used, proactively living and conceptually spreading the ideas Christ himself embraced. They could do what he allegedly did, lead by example.

Send those cards to lonely elderly shut ins. Spend the time helping the poor, giving time and money to those in dire need. Bring comfort to those in hospice, perhaps volunteer at a warming shelter. Nah.

Instead, they’ll complain about being victims of the liberal media, then they’ll go consume mass quantities of Chinese crap electronics, check that the yellow ribbon on their Hummer is still there as they pull out of the handicapped parking space. They’ll talk about the excellent progress on the invasion of a once sovereign nation, and how free they are now that we decided they should be.

After all, that is what Christ would have wanted us to celebrate his birthday.

Maybe a piñata too.