A Self-Proclaimed Sex Offender

X24 is a quiet guy. He lives and works from his Central Wisconsin house and doesn't bother anyone. He's a model citizen and generous neighbor, always willing to lend a hand or a tool, or willing to share his sweetest fishing spots on the Wisconsin River.

Until the evil white trash family moved in next door. They have about 100 dogs that bark all day and all night. He works at home out of an office in his house. Since he lives in Wisconsin he does not require air conditioning-- having the windows open is mostly sufficient. The spring is especially nice beacause you can open the windows and let the cool spring air permeate the house that has been closed for 6 months.

But the ruckus from the dogs is bad with the windows closed, and any window opening is insane because it is so loud. The neighbor is unapproachable and the Stevens Point cops are useless, so X24 is stranded, locked in his airtight home.

Then the kids moved in. Where from they came from he knows not, but the are there. They trample his plants, run in his yard, piss off his dog. He's tolerant and can live with this. However, there is one little pinhead that insists on peeking over the fence and shreaking at the top of her lungs in a shrill scream that rattles the windows and penetrates his skull like a ball-point pen. She insists on doing it at least once every minute during his waking hours.

The neighbor doesn't care about X24 or the chaos in her own yard. His complaints fall on deaf ears. Deep in the deck he had a card he could play, and only he is cool enough to play it flawlessly.

After enduring a day of endless shreaking, he knocked on the neighbor's door. She answered. He made the following statement:

"I see you have kids over and I feel obliged to tell you that I am a registered sex offender and am not supposed to be within 50 yards of children... I suggest you keep them inside".

Since, the children have disappeared and the neighborhood is quiet, except for the insanely barking dogs.

Maybe he can tell her that he's also been arrested for beastiality.