Give Anna Ayala the Finger!

The following is an actual letter submitted to Wendy's Restaurants. If you agree, PLEASE send a note to Wendy's saying that you support Schmootzie's "Give Anna the Finger" Campaign!

Wendy's Consumer Relations
Wendy's International, Inc.
4288 W. Dublin-Granville Rd.
Dublin, OH 43017


Dear Wendy’s,

I think the recent attempt by Anna Ayala to extort money from your company is deplorable. I also commend your immediate response and approach to find the truth in the matter. Unfortunately, your company and franchisee have suffered irreconcilable financial losses and a tarnished reputation because of the incident. I appreciate that you have offered free frosties in an attempt to bring customers back to your restaurants.

However, to restore the public's faith you will need a campaign that is bigger than the original problem. A free frosty doesn't grab media attention like a finger in the chili. I have thought of a golden remedy and pass it along to you for your consideration.

I suggest that you run a “Give Anna the Finger” campaign, a month where 10% of the revenues from Wendy’s Chili will be earmarked to defray the costs of the criminal investigation and prosecution of Anna Ayala, as well as contribute to the cost of her criminal confinement. As Americans, we’re sick and tired of frivolous lawsuits clogging our courts and raising prices for the consumer. If you have the guts to forward this campaign you will sell record amounts of your chili, as well as bring people back to your restaurants. I don’t even eat at Wendy’s, but if you ran this campaign I’d buy 100 gallons of the stuff and dump it down the toilet just to know I was helping to put Ms. Ayala away.

The American consumer respects your strong stance on this issue, and if adopted, “Give Anna the Finger” will be the most resonant fast-food mantra since “Where’s the Beef”. I offer this idea to you with no strings attached. However,maybe you might seize this opportunity to fund a scholarship for training physicians to re-attach severed limbs if this campaign brings you more than enough money to shitcan that bitch.

Again, thank you for your consideration.

(signed)

Dr. Kxxxx Fxxxx
(aka Schmootzie)