Thank You Baby Jesus!

Every night I take Xeenah for a walk and every night I return with a grocery bag with a turd in it. Xeenah is a small dog and usually squats out a stiff little morsel of intestinally-compacted excrement. No big deal.

When I get home I don't like to bring her dookie into the house to discard it. Usually I put the bag into the bed of my truck and then throw it in the garbage the next morning.

One day I neglected to throw it out. On my way to work I reached 40 mph and I saw the bag with the turd in it begin to ghostily levitate into the reflection of my rear view mirror. It danced in the vacuum of air currents above the bed of my truck-- zigging and zagging, diving and weaving, a poo-in-the-bag ballet. As a finale it danced into the high-speed slipstream where it was sucked out of the bed and was ejected from the truck. I watched it scuttle across the street and into a church playground.

I pictured a young child quietly praying in the church... "Baby Jesus, I really would like a Tootsie Roll...."

Imagine his eyes light up when he went outside and thought his savior delivered.