NEW Hurricane Names
Hurricanes are a pain in the ass. As mentioned before, such weather disturbances remind one what it is like to be a bowling pin. You see it coming, you know you are going to get hit, yet there is nothing you can do except laugh when it goes somewhere else.
The only people disappointed with Hurricane Dennis' half-baked money shot were the losers at the Weather Channel that had their weather weiners out for the climatic circle jerk. Luckily, Dennis had little impact because it followed the path of Ivan which already destroyed everything in its path. Dennis just rearranged the rubble.
The idea of personifying a storm is pretty lame. They used to just name them after women, then in the 80's started naming them for men when womens' group became outraged at the sexist hurricane lingo.
I suggest a naming system that more aptly descibes the storm and the expense, headaches and destruction they bring. Read the first few, I have to go to work, so help me out!
(Thanks to Isabella for the comment that filled in the blanks -- in CAPS)
Anus
Bitch
Coochie
Dickweed
Englebert Humperdink
Flatulence
Goon
Homewrecker
Jag
Killdozer
LAP DANCE
Makeamess
NADS
OhShit!
Poopypants
QUACK!
ROVE
SALAMI
TROJAN
URANUS
WalMart
XENU
YIKES!
Zzzzzzzzzz...
posted by Schmootzie @ 5:11 AM
5 Comments:
My humble contributions are in ALL CAPS and/or BOLDED.
Hurricane Names:
Anus
Bitch
Coochie
Dickweed
Englebert Humperdink
Flatulence
Goon
Homewrecker
ISABELLA (already taken, I know, so hows ‘bout Hurricane
ITCHY-KITCHY YA-YA-YA-YA?
I’d give one year of my life to hear the talking hair-dos on cable breathlessly report on the death and destruction imminent in the path of Hurricane Itchy-Kitchy Ya-Ya-Ya-Ya.
Jag
Killdozer
LAP DANCE
Makeamess
NADS
OhShit!
Poopypants
QUACK!
ROVE
SALAMI
TROJAN
URANUS
VENEREAL WARTS
WalMart
XENU
YIKES!
Zzzzzzzzzz...
Excellent. Done deal!
congratulations for stealing a Henry Rollins bit.
Congratulations on being an asshole! If I wanted to rip off Henry Rollins I'd put my name on "Never pay for sex, drugs or office supplies".
Henry's cool, but I've never heard him talk about this before.
You mean he said that there should be a hurricane "Van der Sloot"? Not only is he clever, he can see the future!
Bite me.
Henry Rollins came up with the hurricane thing after he started doing GAP commercials. It doesn't count anyway.
Good stuff schmotzy
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